Yep, I said it. And yes—I’m a dating coach.
Here’s the thing: I’ve made all the mistakes.
I fell for the wrong people because of chemistry. I stayed far too long in relationships that were breaking me down. I wrote people off after one tiny “ick.” I got swept up in butterflies instead of looking for actual compatibility.
For years, I mistook intensity for intimacy. I thought being chosen meant being loved. And I had absolutely no idea what healthy connection was supposed to look or feel like.
I’ve been through two abusive marriages—each one stripping away a little more of my confidence, self-trust, and sense of worth. I kept thinking if I just loved harder, communicated better, or fixed myself enough, things would get better. They didn’t.
All the while, I was a mom with two vulnerable kids watching me navigate chaos and call it love. They saw me lose myself in relationships that didn’t honor me. They watched me give too much, forgive too quickly, and forget my own needs. That realization—that they were learning what love looked like from me—was one of the hardest truths I’ve ever had to face.
My boundaries were practically nonexistent. I confused self-sacrifice with devotion. And when I wasn’t being mistreated by partners, I was mistreating myself—by staying silent, by overgiving, by pretending everything was fine.
Add to that the constant financial stress of trying to rebuild my life, and I often found myself clinging to people or situations that felt “safe” simply because they provided stability. I told myself it was love, but really, it was survival.
It took hitting rock bottom—emotionally, financially, and spiritually—for me to realize that I wasn’t just unlucky in love. I was unhealed in love.
That’s when everything began to change.
I learned to set boundaries and actually keep them. I started listening to my intuition instead of silencing it. I learned that self-respect is far sexier than people-pleasing, and that chemistry without compatibility is just adrenaline in disguise.
And slowly, I rebuilt myself.
Now, I get to help other people do the same. Through my work as a dating coach and matchmaker, I get to shortcut that learning curve for my clients—so they don’t have to waste years repeating the same painful patterns I did.
So yes, I was the worst dater I’ve ever met.
But I turned that mess into my mission.
And if you’ve been feeling stuck, confused, or frustrated by dating—maybe you’re closer to figuring it out than you think.
